


so kiss me

by lucylikestowrite



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Angst, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, F/F, Fade to Black, Fluff, Kissing, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, it's 90 percent established relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2018-08-24
Packaged: 2019-07-01 23:02:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 5,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15783906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucylikestowrite/pseuds/lucylikestowrite
Summary: a collection of askbox drabbles about avalance kissing. ranges from ~200 words to 1k. mostly fluffy, but with some angst (of varying levels of intensity) thrown in. all take place in canon, but not connected or chronological.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All are entirely unedited, and, as such, pretty low quality. But I put enough effort into them that I wanted to crosspost.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jealous Kiss

“She was flirting with you.”

“She wasn't—” Ava cuts herself off with a sigh, rolling her eyes. “She wasn’t flirting with me. She just complimented my dress.”

“That’s 1500s flirting. They were pretty repressed back then.” Sara moves closer. “And, I mean, it’s 2017 flirting too. I say you look good one time, and then you’re dropping hints about your sexuality all over the place.”

“I wasn't—”

Sara finds the laces of Ava’s dress, pulling her closer. “If it worked on you once, what’s to say it’s not going to work on you again.”

“I didn’t have a girlfriend then,” Ava says, a small smile on her face. “You don’t need to worry. There’s nothing to be jealous of.” She pauses, looking down at Sara’s fingers. “Although I’m not sure if you were jealous because she was flirting with me—”

“—so you admit it—”

“—or because she wasn’t flirting with you.”

Sara’s face falls into an expression of mock horror. “You think I care about that?”

Ava shrugs, but there’s a tiny bit of worry beneath it, that she’s not enough, that she’s never going to be enough.

Sara’s face grows serious at the same time Ava’s does, using the purchase she has on the strings that lace up the front of Ava’s dress to pull her close. When their faces are an inch apart, she stops them.

“I was jealous because she was flirting with you and you’re mine,” Sara says, her voice hard.

Sara kisses her, one hand still on Ava’s waist, one moving up to pull Ava’s hair out of the careful, period appropriate style it had been teased into, tangling her fingers through it in a way that is blatantly possessive. She presses Ava back towards the wall, her mouth hard, relentless.

Her hand in Ava’s hair has stopped moving, is fixed on the back of Ava’s head, keeping her face close. When Sara pulls back, her pupils are blown, and she nods down to Ava’s wrist.

Her voice is rough when she speaks. “Get us to your place. Now.”

They’re still kissing as Ava hits the shortcut on her wrist, as they stumble through the portal backwards, Sara’s jealousy obviously loathe to let go of Ava.

Ava isn’t complaining.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Height Difference Kisses Where One Person Has To Bend Do Wn And The Other Is On Their Tippy Toes

“You’re wearing stilettos,” Sara says, reproachful.

Ava looks down. “Yes, I am. Good spot, Sara. Real astute.”

“Why?”

“I’ve got a board meeting. I like being taller than them.”

“Oh,” Sara says. “I guess that explains the outfit, then.”

Ava’s normal pantsuit has been switching out for a fancier one, slightly more slim fitting, slightly more expensive looking. “You questioned the heels but not the outfit?”

“The outfit,” Sara says, pressing up on her toes, “is not making me feel short. Just underdressed,” she adds, as an afterthought.

She’s barefoot, still in her pyjamas. Ava had been up for an hour; Sara had only just dragged herself out of bed.

Sara loops her arms around Ava’s neck. “You’re too tall.”

Ava smiles, leaning down slightly, kissing Sara lightly. “Maybe,” she says, looking down briefly at her wrist, “maybe you’re too short.”

“Rude, baby. Rude.”

“Cold hard truth, Sara,” Ava says, walking backwards towards the now open portal. There’s a smile on her face when she says, “I’ll see you tonight.”

“Wait,” Sara says, sprinting forwards, tugging Ava’s face back down towards her. She’s trying to make Ava do the work, but she still ends up pressing up slightly, too eager to wait for Ava to get close enough. “That was hardly a kiss,” she continues, dragging Ava close enough to kiss her properly.

When she pulls away, Ava’s eyes are still closed, lips parted slightly, and she’s beautiful, even if she is too tall.

“Okay. Now you can go.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last Kiss.
> 
> Warning: seriously angsty with zero happy ending. read at your own risk.

"You don’t have to go back, Ava. You’re not like them.”

Sara’s heart is in the right place, but it doesn’t matter, because she’s so wrong.

“I’m exactly like all of them. Any of them could’ve been me. How is it fair that I get to sit here, live my life, be in love,” she sees Sara flinch, but she keeps going, because she has to, “and just ignore all of them? Ignore what they’re going through? When they’re all just versions of me?”

Sara’s eyes are blazing. “They’re not— they’re not you. Just stay. Please. I need you. I’ve always needed you.”

Ava can’t look at her. “They need me. They're— they’re the closest thing I have to family.”

Sara moves in front of Ava so that she’s forced to look at her. Her eyes search Ava’s face, wild. “I can be your family.” Her voice is frantic. “Fuck it, I’ll marry you if it’ll make you stay.”

The words hit Ava like a ton of bricks. She blinks, pushing back tears.

“Baby. Please. Say something.”

“I have to go,” Ava says, moving to walk away, but Sara grabs her arms, stops her.

“No. You want to. It’s not the same.”

“I have to—”

Sara cuts her off, kissing her, both hands on Ava’s neck, and Ava can taste salt. She doesn’t know who’s crying, her or Sara or both of them. Sara’s never kissed her quite like this before, and Ava knows why. Sara’s giving up. It’s goodbye. There is something behind her movements, in her lips and her hands, which breaks Ava’s heart.

It’s Ava that pulls back. It was only ever going to be Ava that pulls back.

Sara’s hands fall away from Ava’s skin. “Don’t go,” she says, one last time, but there’s nothing behind the words.

“I’m sorry,” Ava says, opening the portal, stepping through—and, before it closes, chucking the courier back through. If she doesn’t have a way to get back, this will be easier.

The last thing she sees is Sara’s face, utterly defeated her lips still slightly kiss-swollen, and Ava’s heart breaks into a million more pieces.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kisses Meant To Distract The Other Person From Whatever They Were Intently Doing

“Stop it,” Ava says, sounding vaguely put out, swatting her hand out behind her-aimlessly, because she’s not looking at Sara, but at the laptop between her legs.

“Stop what?” Sara asks, putting on her innocent voice, her arms wrapping tighter around Ava’s waist, pressing up slightly on her knees so she can get her chin onto Ava’s shoulder. She turns her head slightly, kisses the side of Ava’s neck. “This?”

“Yes, that,” Ava says, exasperated. “I need to send this email.”

“It’s 11pm, baby, it can’t be that urgent,” Sara says. “We’re in bed. It can wait.”

She sweeps Ava’s hair aside, finds the nape of Ava’s neck with her lips. Underneath her, she feels a shiver run through Ava’s body.

“Sara,” Ava cautions. “I really need to send this email. Like, really.”

“Not stopping you,” Sara murmurs, her mouth moving lower, down Ava’s spine, over the naked skin that’s making stopping very difficult. Ava wasn’t supposed to be sending emails right now. They were supposed to be doing other things, but then Ava had remembered something ‘urgent’, and Sara was suffering because of it.

Apparently, the feeling of Sara’s lips on her back is enough to finally get Ava to stop. She spins around, finally facing her, the laptop still in her lap. “Sara. This email is practically life and death.”

“Practically?” Sara asks, tilting her head.

“Okay, not actually, but close,” Ava says, looking down to her screen, her fingers moving on the keyboard.

Sara considers this for a second, then speaks again. “Ava. You have thirty seconds to finish that email or I’m breaking the laptop.” Ava looks up, her expression scandalised. Sara just raises an eyebrow in response. “I could literally tear it in half, baby, don’t test me.”

Ava sighs, rolls her eyes at the drama, but her typing speeds up. Sara eyes the clock. When it gets down to ten seconds, she leans closer. She counts down the last seconds out loud as they tick away. Ava slams the laptop closed on two.

“Good choice,” Sara says, pressing Ava down onto the mattress. “But you’re going to have to move that laptop, or I’m kicking it off the bed.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kiss in a dream

Sara’s eyes are dark. Ava can’t breathe. Something in her is telling her that she shouldn’t be doing this. Sara is still strictly a fugitive from the Bureau. Sure, they’re in a slight détente right now, ever since Sara turned Rip in, but they shouldn’t be doing this.

Ava shouldn’t be on the Waverider. She can’t remember how she got here. All she knows is that Sara is staring at her with something that isn’t hate in her eyes. It’s something like interest, intrigue.

In her hand is a glass of whiskey. When Ava looks down, she’s holding one as well. Sara moves closer, and the walk takes longer than it should. She’s moving feet, and it feels like it takes minutes, Ava watching as Sara moves towards her like a predator stalking its prey.

When Sara finally reaches Ava, there’s a smirk on her face. “Cheers,” she says, clinking her glass against Ava’s.

Something in Ava makes her ask, “To what?”

Sara tilts her head, sets her glass down, then takes Ava’s and places it next to her own. “To kissing. Us kissing, specifically. Isn’t that what you came here for?” Her brow crinkles, and it’s a little bit adorable.

But the words strike something inside of Ava. Of course that’s what she came here for. Nothing else makes sense.

She just nods, wordlessly, and then Sara is kissing her. Her mouth tastes like whiskey, and she’s eager, working Ava’s mouth open, licking in, making Ava’s legs feel weak, and then they’re literally giving way, Ava is falling, and Sara’s falling with her and–

Ava wakes up with a gasp. Her whole body is tense, and she feels like she can taste Sara Lance. Sara Lance, who she’s never kissed.

Sara Lance, who she didn’t even think she _wanted_ to kiss. 

Sara Lance, who her subconscious apparently very much wants to kiss.

She closes her eyes, slumping back down on the pillow, and all she can think is, _“Well, that’s new.”_


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "i almost lost you" kiss

“If you ever do something like that again, I’m going to kill you.”

Sara smiles weakly, laughs, and then her face screws up in pain as the movement tears at the bullet wound in her side. Her voice, when she speaks, is dry, raspy, and her breath rattles after every word. “Violence is never the answer, Ava.”

Ava shakes her head, tear tracks on her cheeks, as she looks down at Sara, where she’s laid out on the chair in the med-bay.

“You could’ve _died._ If that bullet had been half an inch to the left…” she trails off, because she can’t even think it. “Why the fuck would you do something like that? Take a bullet for me?”

Sara stares back at her. “Because I love you,” she says, because surely that’s obvious.

“I almost _lost_ you,” Ava says, her voice breaking. “You almost died back there. Love doesn’t mean anything if you’re _gone._ ”

“Hey,” Sara says, forcing the words out, despite the pain that speaking is causing her. She still sounds half dead, but then, that’s better than fully dead. “It’s okay. I’m still here.”

Ava leans down, wiping a lock of hair off Sara’s face, her thumb rubbing at what Sara can only assume is blood on her skin. Her hand moves to cup Sara’s cheek, and Sara instinctively leans into the touch.

“I want to kiss you,” Ava says, her face pained.

“Why aren’t you, then?” Sara says, somehow managing to make her voice sound something other than the horrible whisper it’s become, somehow injecting something like a challenge into it.

Ava frowns. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

Sara shakes her head. “Gideon’s started the pain meds. I’ll be fine.” Ava still looks worried. “Baby. You can kiss me.”

Apparently Ava’s need to be close to Sara wins out over her anxiety, because she’s closing the gap between them, kissing Sara softly, too softly. She pulls away too soon. “I almost lost you.”

“You didn’t,” Sara says, and Ava sighs, nods, and leans back down.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “A Gentle ‘I Love You’ Whispered After A Soft Kiss, Followed Immediately By A Stronger Kiss”

They’re not doing anything, in particular. They’re just at home, relaxing. Ava’s still not used to that. Home. 

She’d never called the last apartment she’d live in home, and that made sense once the reason-that she hadn’t even chosen it herself-became clear. But this place? It feels like home. Sara agreeing to stay there a couple of nights a week had made it feel like home. Like _their_ home.

It’s raining. Sara is curled up against Ava, her head on Ava’s shoulder. Ava’s arm is wrapped around Sara, keeping her tight, close.

Ostensibly, she’s reading, but Ava hasn’t seen her turn the page for at least 10 minutes.

Ava nudges her, her voice soft. “Hey. You okay? Forgotten how to read?” she asks, teasing.

Sara closes the book. “Yeah. Just distracted.”

“By?”

Sara turns to her, her expression vulnerable, without a hint of jest. “You. This place. The fact that it’s ours. You,” she repeats. “You’re the worst kind of distraction.”

“I’m not doing anything,” Ava protests.

“Exactly,” Sara says. “The worst kind of distraction. You’re not doing anything and I can’t stop thinking about you.”

“I-”

Sara cuts her off, kissing her, soft and sweet and beautiful. When she pulls away, her eyes are still closed, and she takes a deep breath, a blissed out look on her face.

She opens her eyes, and something shifts inside of Ava, and the words that she’s been struggling with since Sara said them to her a month ago fall out of her mouth, easily. “I love you.”

Sara’s mouth falls open slightly, and then it twists into a smile, wide, happy. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Fuck. I love you.”

Ava isn’t even sure how it happens, because it’s so fast, but all of a sudden, their positions have shifted, and she’s on her back, and Sara’s on top of her, her hand tangling in Ava’s hair, and the second kiss is anything but sweet. It’s hard, pent up tension being released, Sara kissing eagerly, teasing Ava’s mouth open. On anyone else, it would be sloppy, but Sara is pinpoint precise as always, kissing exactly how she knows Ava likes it. 

When she finally pulls away, Ava knows she’s flushed. Sara just smirks. “Okay. I changed my mind. You’re the best kind of distraction.”

“I try.”

Sara doesn’t say anything for a second, then smiles again. “I love you too.”

It sounds like she’s been waiting a long time to say those words.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Routine Kisses Where The Other Person Presents Their Cheek/Forehead For The Hello/Goodbye Kiss Without Even Looking Up From What They’re Doing 
> 
> AND 
> 
> Kisses Where One Person Is Sitting In The Other’s Lap

Sara portals in to the house, stretching out her muscles as she does. It’s been a long day, and she just wants to see Ava. There hadn’t been any excuse to call the Bureau, and she’s missed her acutely.

The living room is empty, so is the kitchen. “Ava?” She calls out, shrugging off her jacket.

“Up here,” comes the faint reply. “Office.”

Sara looks at her watch. It’s right. Ava should be long done, but, of course, she’s not. She takes the stairs two at a time.

The door to the office is slightly ajar. Ava is still focused on the screen, her tongue slightly out in concentration.

Sara nudges the door open, leaning in the doorway. “Hey,” she says.

Ava doesn’t turn to look at her, keeps staring at the screen, and just says, “Hi,” back, her voice tired, slightly harangued.

Sara moves closer, crosses the floor to stand by Ava’s side. Ava’s still focusing on what appears to be a spreadsheet, but, almost like she’s not thinking about it, she tilts her head slightly, proffering her skin to Sara. Sara can’t help the gentle smile that breaks on her face as she leans down, wipes Ava’s hair back from her temple, lays a kiss there. “Hey,” she says again, her lips close to Ava’s skin, her hand still in her hair.

A flicker of a smile crosses Ava’s face, and she finally tears her eyes away from the screen.

Sara’s fingers are still intertwined in Ava’s hair, and she uses that to gently tilt Ava’s face upwards, so that their eyes can finally meet. Her fingertips rubs gently against Ava’s scalp, and Ava sighs. “Sorry.”

A frown forms on Sara’s face. “For what?”

Ava gestures at the laptop. “I was distracted. Didn’t greet you properly.”

Sara laughs. “Don’t be an idiot. You’ve got things on your plate. You’re busy. You don’t owe me anything.”

Casting her eyes down, Ava sighs again. “Yeah, I suppose.”

“You’re perfect just as you are,” she says, leaning back down, pressing a second kiss to the same spot as before. Ava’s eyes flutter shut, her lips parting. “But if you were super worried, I know what would make me feel even better right now.”

“Oh yeah?” Ava asks, her eyes still closed, her skin warm under Sara’s fingers. “What might that be?”

Sara pauses, looking at the laptop. “Are you done?”

Ava shakes her head. “Just need to file one more document.”

“Okay,” Sara says. “I’ll wait.” She goes to pull her hand away from Ava’s face, but Ava makes a noise in the back of her throat, so she keeps it where it is.

A minute later, Ava closes the laptop. “Now I’m done. What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking,” Sara says, dragging the chair out slightly, walking round so she’s in front of Ava, “that it’s been too long since I was in your lap.”

Ava tilts her head, pressing her lips together sceptically. “It’s been…” she trails off, obviously thinking. “… a day.”

“Yeah,” Sara breathes, settling down, her legs either side of Ava’s. “Too long.”

* * *

There’s something about having Sara in her lap that makes Ava feel safe, and right now is no different.

A minute ago, she’d been worried about being rude, but Sara’s words, and her familiar weight, have wiped that away.

Sara’s arms rest lightly on Ava’s shoulders. Ava’s hands go automatically to Sara’s waist, keeping her safe there, but she doesn’t really need to do that—Sara’s never slipped off, no matter how into it she’s gotten.

But she seems to like the touch, a smile breaking on her face as Ava’s thumb runs over her hip, and she leans forward, burying her face in Ava’s shoulder.

After a couple of seconds like that, silence in the air, the only sounds them breathing in tandem, Sara pulls back. One of her hands leaves Ava’s shoulder, instead moves to tuck a stray piece of hair back into Ava’s bun, her fingers moving with careful precision, a look of concentration on her face.

“Hey,” Ava says, finally with the right cadence, with the love she wanted to be there before present.

“Hey yourself,” Sara says. “How’re you holding up?”

“Better, now,” Ava admits, because it’s true. She’s not thinking about all the things she has to do at work tomorrow or the anxiety of before. She’s just thinking about the here and now.

“That’s what I like to hear,” Sara says, her voice soft. Her hand moves to splay over Ava’s cheek, her thumb softly stroking. She leans in, and Ava can’t help but press up, wanting.

Sara shakes her head. “Relax, baby. You don’t have to work for it. I’m coming to you. Just… be patient.”

Ava slumps back against the chair, her hands gripping Sara’s hips tighter. Sara leans in closer, until her lips are almost touching Ava’s, until Ava can feel the warmth of her breath, and just hovers, moving her head from side to side like she’s trying to decide on an angle.

Despite what Sara had said, Ava can’t help but chase Sara’s mouth with her own, until Sara’s hand stops her. “Relax, Ava,” Sara says again, her voice firm, low. “I’m getting there.”

Ava finally gives in, stops trying follow Sara’s movements, and she’s rewarded by the soft touch of Sara’s mouth on the edge of her lip. Not a proper kiss, but a tease. A tease soaked in love and affection, but still a tease.

Sara works her way around Ava’s mouth. Halfway through, she stops, and Ava can almost feel herself trembling in anticipation—and for nothing more than a kiss. “You’re doing so good, baby,” Sara whispers. “Almost there.”

When she gets back to where she started—the very bottom of Ava’s bottom lip, she pulls back, looking at Ava.

“You’ve gone all pink,” Sara muses.

Ava coughs, tries to put some sort of dignity into her voice. “I wonder why,” she says, drily.

“Maybe because you’ve been waiting for this,” Sara says, and then she’s leaning forward all the way, her hand slinking around to the back of Ava’s neck, pulling her close—and kissing her.

The sigh of relief that Ava releases is involuntary, and the sound seems to spur Sara on, her mouth getting harder, forcing Ava’s open, her tongue licking inside. Her body is grinding against Ava’s, her hips pressing down into Ava’s lap, and if things were soft before, they’re anything but now.

Sara rises up slightly, forcing Ava’s head to tilt upwards to follow her. One of the hands that was on Sara’s hips moves upwards, underneath her shirt, where her stomach muscles are tensed with the effort of keeping her where she is, hovering above Ava’s lap.

After a couple of seconds though, Ava misses the weight, and pulls her back down. Sara pauses for a second, and then keeps going, apparently deciding not to say anything.

Ava is glad. She doesn’t want either of them stopping to talk.

Not now. Not when she waited so patiently for this. She doesn’t want them ever to stop, doesn’t want to move, but a part of her tells her they’ll have to, if they’re going to do anything about the way Sara’s hips cant against Ava’s.

And then Ava feels motion between their chests, and realises Sara is unbuttoning her shirt, and, maybe, they don’t need to move at all.

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kiss of life

“Ava. Ava. Come on. You’ve got to— you’ve got to breathe. Come on.”

Sara knows it’s useless talking to her. It’s not going to bring her back. All that’s going to help is the hands Sara has working on Ava’s chest, a steady rhythm.

But she can’t help but talk. “Ava. Baby. Please. I got you out of that damn lake. All you need to do is open your eyes. Do it for me. Please.”

She remembers something she read about how people never do CPR hard enough. That it breaks people’s ribs when hospitals do it, so she pushes down harder, all the work outs she’s ever put herself through coming down to this moment.

This moment, alone, with no backup, no courier, and Ava, lying on the ground, not breathing, her heart not beating.

She’s counting in her head, trying to remember how many she’s supposed to do, and then she thinks she hears a crack after a particularly hard push, and she can’t do anymore, so she’s leaning down, trying to remember what Ray had taught her about this.

Tipping Ava’s head back, blowing air into her lungs. Trying not to cry. Trying not to think of what happens if she fails.

She can’t fail.

She wishes she had Ava here to help her, but she doesn’t, because Ava is far away, further away than she’s ever been, hovering between life and death.

Sara goes back to pressing down, trying not to care about breaking things, because she just needs Ava breathing. If she can get her breathing, she can find a phone, call the Waverider, and Gideon will be able to fix her, properly.

All Sara needs to do is get her breathing, get her heart beating.

She vaguely remembers thirty, and counts to that, the wind whistling the only sound other than her own laboured breathing. She feels selfish for being able to breathe right now, when Ava can’t. When Ava hasn’t for too long. So long. Minutes, but it feels like hours.

Sara reaches thirty, and moves back to Ava’s mouth, pushing as much air into her throat as she can, silently pleading that this time will be enough. She never wants to have to kiss Ava like this again. She wants Ava alive, responding, that same smile on her face she always gets when Sara moves to kiss her.

Ava’s not stirring through, so she moves back to her chest, and puts everything she has into the compressions, pressing down hard, so hard—

And then Ava coughs, water spurting out of her mouth.

It feels like the whole world has just tipped back into place. Like Sara can see colour again. A warm feeling of relief spreads through her.

“Ava?” Sara asks, frantic.

“Yeah,” Ava says, her voice tiny. “Yeah. Sara.”

She tries to sit up, and then yells out in pain. Sara presses her down. “Don’t try to sit up, baby. I think I broke about four of your ribs.”

“That would explain the searing pain in my chest,” Ava says, matter of fact, groaning slightly, her hand going to her ribs.

“Sorry,” Sara says, grimacing. “I’ll have you healed in no time.” She points to a cabin behind them, obviously empty, since no-one had come out to help. “I’ll break in. They’ll have a phone. There’s a number for the Waverider. They’ll be here as soon as I call them, and then it’ll all be fine. Just. Don’t close your eyes until I get back, okay?”

Ava nods, but she looks sleepy, so Sara shakes her. Ava moans in pain, but the shock of Sara purposely hurting her seems to push the sleep out of her eyes.

“If I get back and you’re dead, l’ll get Constantine to take me to the afterlife and kill you again,” Sara says. “I didn’t break half of my girlfriend’s ribs for you to die on me.”

Ava nods, her eyes wide. “Okay. I won’t fall asleep. Promise.”

“Pinky?”

“Yeah,” Ava says, proffering her hand out. When Sara links their pinkies, she uses what little strength she has to pull Sara down, their mouths meeting.

“Thanks for saving my life, babe.”

“Any time.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sad kiss and Being Unable To Open Their Eyes For A Few Moments Afterward

“How long are you going be away?” Sara asks, not quite able to process what Ava’s just told her.

Ava looks down at her hands. They’re twisting in her lap. “I don’t know. Six months, maybe more. I wouldn’t be doing it if there was anything else who could but I just- I can’t put anyone else in that sort of danger.”

Sara laughs, low and rueful. Of course she can’t. That’s Ava to a tee. Not willing to put any of her agents in the line of fire if she’d be better suited. Sometimes (all the time) Sara wishes Ava were less selfless. Wishes she’d think about herself, about protecting her (protecting them), instead.

“And there won’t be… any sort of communication? At all?”

“No.” Ava shakes her head. “Nothing. It’s a low tech settlement. They’ve banned it all. I won’t be able to take anything. My courier, my phone. Nothing.”

Sara sighs. “There’s no-one else who could do it? Really?”

“Yes, really, Sara,” Ava’s voice is rising, sounding annoyed, but Sara knows she’s not truly angry, just stressed. Sad. Resigned–and it’s coming out as frustration.

“Okay. Okay.” Sara moves closer. “Okay. If you have to do it then… you have to do it.”

Ava turns away for a second, and then, when she looks back, something has changed on her face.

“You don’t have to-” she stops, looking upwards, searching for the words. “You don’t have to wait for me.”

“What?” Sara asks, aghast.

“You don’t have to wait for me,” Ava repeats. “I won’t blame you if you don’t.”

Sara’s still not quite processing it. She’s trying to figure out what Ava’s saying, trying to find her real meaning. “Do you… do you want me not to wait for you? Is this you breaking up with me?”

“No! No! No. I don’t.” Ava’s expression is panicked, almost distraught. “I just didn’t want to hold you back.”

“You’re never holding me back. I’ll wait. Obviously.”

“Yeah?” Ava is sniffing, and, as Sara watches, tears begin to fall.

“Yeah, Ava, obviously. Fuck, come here, baby,” Sara says. When Ava is in front of her, she reaches up, wiping at the tears that fall. “It’ll be fine.”

“It’s so long. We haven’t even… we haven’t even been together for six months.”

“Ava,” Sara says, finding her face with both her hands. “It’ll be fine.”

She presses up, closing the space between them. Ava gasps as their lips meet, a watery sound. Her eyelids flutter closed, and Sara feels that against her skin. This kiss feels different. It’s aching with sadness, from the way Ava feels almost completely still underneath her hands, to the way Ava’s fingers grip Sara’s shirt so tightly it must be hurting her.

When Sara pulls back, Ava’s eyes are still closed. They don’t open, not for a couple of seconds, Ava’s eyes moving restlessly underneath them. When she finally opens her eyes, they’re still watery, still glazed with tears.

“You okay?” Sara asks.

“Yeah. Yeah. I suppose. Just trying to memorise that.”

“It’s not our last kiss,” Sara says. “You don’t go for another week.”

“I know. I want to memorise them all.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Needing to kiss to hide from bad guys

“Kiss me, quick,” Sara says, suddenly.

“What?” Ava asks. “We’re in public. I’m not— we said we didn’t have to do that.”

“I know. I know. I’m sorry, babe, but we really need a distraction right now, because I just saw some guys that I’m pretty sure I put in prison back when I was the Canary, and there’s literally nowhere for us to go.”

Ava looks around, and Sara’s right. There’s nowhere to go. “Kiss you?” She asks. “You’re sure that’s the best way to go?”

“We’re on a date, baby. I don’t want to get into a fight. Just kiss me. The bigger the better.”

The bigger the better. The words sit heavy in Ava’s stomach, the idea of that level of affection in public stressing her out already, but Sara’s smiling at her, and she feels slightly better, slightly more reassured.

“Big?” Ava asks.

Sara nods, looks over ava’s shoulder. “They’re coming our way.”

Ava doesn’t waste any time, closing the space between them, pulling Sara close, hard. Locking their hips together, her hands around Sara’s waist, gripping down.

Her mouth is harder than she ever thought she’d let it be in public, more aggressive, demanding more from Sara, all thoughts of inhibitions out the window. She’s just kissing, is just a mouth and hands and Sara under her, yielding.

She’s leaning forwards, and Sara’s back is curving. Ava can feel it under her hands. She wants Sara’s clothes off, but now is not the time, so she just settles for reaching under Sara’s jacket, under her shirt, to the bare skin below.

Sara starts a little at the touch, stuttering against Ava’s mouth, but she doesn’t break the kiss, doesn’t slow it down. Instead, what feels like a smile breaks on her face as she continues to let Ava’s mouth work on hers.

Ava feels Sara’s eyelashes flutter against her skin, and is about to be offended that she’s opening her eyes, and then remembers why they’re kissing. Sara pulls back. “They’re gone. Public displays of affection always make people uncomfortable. Especially,” she takes a breath, “especially ones like that.”

Swallowing, Ava opens her eyes, meets Sara’s gaze. Her lips are swollen. Her face is pink. “I did good?”

“You always do good,” Sara says, “but yeah. Although,” she pauses, finding Ava’s belt loops. “I think we’re going to have to cut the date short, anyway?”

Ava raises an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“Yeah. Unless you were also comfortable screwing me in public.”


End file.
